October 08, 2003 ~ 10:39 p.m.
Feeling:
Song of the Day: "Someday We'll Know" ~ Mandy Moore & Jonathan Foreman
I know I've had some pretty weird and even scary dreams in the past...but last night was one that creeped me out. It wasn't one of those bad nightmares that I'd wake up screaming from; it was what happeend in the dream that terrified me.
I can't remember exactly how the dream began, but I do remember one part. I was riding with my dad in his truck when I looked out the window to my right and saw someone with a gun. All of sudden, I was shot. I could 'feel' the bullets penetrate right through me several times. It horrified me.
I think my dad was shot as well, but I was so struck with fear and the feeling that blood was pouring out of me that I couldn't see or think of anything else. Then later at one point I ended up in...what I would almost presume was my home, but not exactly how it looks. Even though I felt like I was dying, I was still breathing and I could only see what was in front of me. I felt like it had been a while since I had been shot.
Then afterward, someone who I can't remember was helping me walk, and we just walked along and looked at the sky. I though I was trying to talk but when I was talking my throat felt dry and my voice was cracked, because apparently I had the feeling that a few of the bullets were in my neck.
And...that's as far as I can remember. Now this was one terrifying dream. I didn't remember a thing about it until I was riding in my dad's car on the way to school this morning. I was about to go into mental breakdown just thinking about it but I tried to hold it back. Then I began to think why I had the dream. I was assuming that the reason that I was shot in my dream was that it could be a sign of a fatal consequence of me not doing all of my responsibilities. But...maybe not.
Anyway, this dream (or maybe nightmare) really took the cake. Once again, it remind me of my fear of blood. I may not be afraid of a small scratch or something, but I writhe and feel sick to my stomach when I see a lot of it. Flowing like a thick red river. Do they have a scientific word for that?
It was one of the scariest dreams I've had, aside from the dream where I saw a flying car crash and blood splashed out of nowhere. Or when I was being chased by zombies and pools of blood was following me like it wanted to eat me up like acid. Worst of all, that dream where there was a killer after me and bloody corpses lay all around and in the walls.
They all seem to have the theme of blood in common. I just wonder what the purpose of those dreams were. Dreams are dreams and I know they're not real and that by a big chance they will not happen.
The day will come when I will know...
Can't take this crap anymore...
Torn
Staying Strong
Heavenly Music
A Filipino Drunkard's Party
Living life »»†«« in solitude...
